Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Why everyone should be pregnant at Christmas ...

It sounds odd, but I think every woman should go through the Holidays in a very pregnant state at least once and here's why:

10. People have to be nice to you. You can't be a Bah Humbug to a waddling basketball. You just can't.

9. Everyone carries your stuff. Cuz ya know, I can't. It's nice.

8. Strange old women at the grocery stores are too busy to come over and rub your belly. This is a true bonus.

7. Once the nesting kicks in you actually look forward to all the Christmas baking and tomfoolery. Have I mentioned that I made 8 dozen truffles in the last 2 days? I'm quite proud.

6. You get to eat all the goodies you want. And the truffle count is down to 6 dozen ... and dropping. But who wouldn't eat those? Mmm. 5 dozen. (Note: This picture is totally for Emily, who makes taking pictures of great food into quite the hobby.)
5. I don't need a coat. I take my own heater everywhere and completely avoid going from too cold outside to too hot inside.

4. I don't have to worry about looking good for family pictures. I just let that belly hang on out there.

3. You're totally allowed to forget stuff: Didn't send a Christmas card to Uncle Lewis? Sorry ... pregnant brain. Happens. Better luck next year.

2. No one asks you to plan anything. It would be more stress. :)

1. Holiday weight gain is expected, demanded by doctors even!

And now for a news bulletin: If you don't have awesome Holiday plans you should join me and my awesome writer's group, The SIX, for our minutes of fame at 7:00 p.m. MST (9:00 p.m. EST) tomorrow, Dec. 16th.

We will be doing an interview on how to have an awesome writing group like ours and how most of us (not me ... yet) have broken into the publishing world and dominated! Yes, DOMINATED!

Here's how to participate:

1: At the appointed time, dial
1-218-862-7200
(long distance charges may apply, depending on your phone plan)

2: Enter the Conference Code: 245657

3: To raise your hand and ask a question, dial 5*

4: To Mute yourself, dial 4*

For more information, you can visit their site at http://www.authorsadvisory.blogspot.com/

2 comments:

  1. I accused a pregnant woman of having "mommy mush brain" in court once. Got reprimanded by the male judge. She denied having the condition. Whatever. :) Maybe if I'd just called it "pregnant brain?"

    I'm excited for tomorrow night!

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  2. I'm so happy you're pregnant. I need a baby to hold!

    ReplyDelete